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My name is Hope, and I sing like Miley Cyrus, dance like Lady Gaga, and I look prettier than Kendall Jenner. To be precise, my mom wants me to be like that. In reality, it’s even hard for me to justify my name – Hope.
From the age of five my mother forced me into various classes trying to find my talent and make me a star. But within a few weeks of classes (surprise!), they figured out that I wasn’t that talented, and my mother pulled me from one class to another, and a month later – another. Here is a brief list of what I did until I turned 14: dancing, music, painting, gymnastics, singing, a little figure skating, about two months of theater, and much more. Maybe I could have succeeded in something if my mother had just been a little more patient.
After switching between a dozen classes, my mother began to get really upset, but that was around the time that TV programs for “talented” children came to the rescue. My mom now has a new hope that her Hope can become a star. That even sounds weird. From that moment on, I attended an infinite number of castings but I was turned down at “The Voice” because I don’t sing well enough. I was kicked out from “World of Dance”, because I`m a terrible dancer. And they didn’t even take me to “America`s Got Talent,” because I obviously did not have talent. At some point, I had already thought that maybe I needed to change my name to “Hopeless.” It sounds bad, but everything would be clear right away. No expectations, no complaints.
The turning point was at one of these castings. Honestly, I don`t even remember for what it was for. And naturally, they turned me down. But they also said that, “She needs to go to modeling school first.” Oh, this phrase set a fire in my mother’s eyes. “Hope, this is exactly what you need!” And the very next day I met with new people from a modeling school.
I do have to say that I did very well. Because “Wha-a-a-at? I need to walk around the stage? Did you see what I was doing before? And now I just needed to walk properly? Ha-ha, give me a stage, and I’ll walk all over it! ”
Soon, I began to participate in various beauty contests, and I liked it. More precisely, I liked the attention I received at school after these competitions. My mom was much more passionate about it. She was so worried before every contest. A week before the pageant, she would get nervous. I couldn’t eat chocolate, because “Hope, you won’t fit in your dress.” I couldn’t go for a walk, because “Hope, you need to spend more time preparing,” and I couldn’t even communicate with friends, because “Hope, I want to control your life even more!” Every time it was a nightmare. A nightmare for me, and a pleasure for my mom. It was strange, because in two years I hadn’t even won a single contest. I was just a girl who “showed herself well, too.” But after each pageant my mother was radiant with joy and for a few weeks, I could be free of her training.
Winter came and the holidays began. Oh, happy vacation time! I could hang out with friends all day and have fun. I could, but only if I didn`t participate in the next stupid pageant! I wanted to spend time outside, but my mother just lost her mind! I literally couldn’t do anything! We fought, and I just ran out of patience. My mother shouted: “This time everything is different, this is a very important competition. They will be selecting participants for “Miss State!” So I shouted back: “It’s always different and always very important. I haven’t left the house for a week! If this is the life of a model, then I pass! Take part in this contest by yourself!” I ran to my room and closed the door. But I was not going to just sit quietly at home. I got dressed, opened the window, and jumped into the snowdrift that was against the house.
I was so happy to finally get out! I missed my friends so much! We were having snowball fights, rolling downhill, making snow angels. In short – I felt like a child and I missed that. Someone brought a big sled, and we decided to ride it down the hill together. As soon as we started, I immediately felt like we were going too fast and we had absolutely no way to brake. We were knocked off course and we crashed into a pole. Lifting our heads, exchanging glances with each other, we began to laugh. Oh, that was awesome! This is adrenaline! Let’s do it again!
But when I tried to get up, I felt a terrible pain in my leg. It was as if my ankle just filled with pain and it was so strong that I immediately began to cry. I was afraid to even look down. My friends loaded me onto the sleigh and took me to the hospital. As we drove, there were so many thoughts in my head that I could not even sift through all of them.
Music by Epidemic Sound: https://www.epidemicsound.com
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